i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
