he thought i was a dude.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
Randomize