everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
Welp...herpes.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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