Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I love having hate sex.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
Randomize
