At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
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