i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
