So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I defriended her. I just can't support someone whose profile picture is of their water birth.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I know but we're going to blackout city so it'll probably be warm there
I had to cum in my sink.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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