I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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