Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
I deserve this hangover.
Randomize
