I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Randomize
