By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
Randomize
