remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
