their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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