Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
It finally happened. My conscience stopped working. I've never felt so free
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
