i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Randomize
