I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
