? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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