I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
I wasn't so much your wingman at that point as I was the interpreter of you point at shit and mumbling to the cab driver.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Randomize
