My liver just broke up with me...
I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
She was so adorably desperate I didn't have the heart to tell her I wasn't a lesbian. So now She's making waffles, may switch teams over this.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
