whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
