Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
Randomize
