I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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