It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Let's paint friendship bongs
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
