Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
I'm just going to tell you this I knocked up your girlfriend. I didn't mean to I thought it was somebody else I wasn't drunk but it was dark.
The truth is better her than my wife.
Randomize
