I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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