My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
He passed out mid-signature
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
