Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
of course. lets lasso hookers.
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
