pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Tim hortons said i dont meet their criteria. What the fuck criteria is that? You put bagels in an oven.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
