honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
