i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I just want to meet a nice normal guy that doesn't want me to taze him while we have sex. . . . .is that too much to ask for?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
