I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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