I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I tell you, MacGyver never had to put up with people shitting themselves while he worked...
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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