I'm wearing a childsize birthday hat and a bib. I am the def of sex appeal rite now
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
If I die, sorry about rent.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
