all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Randomize
