It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
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