It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
