tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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