You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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