Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
