You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I just realized. my grades aren't ready for st patties day...
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
I need a new best friend. Someone who drinks like a fish, hooks up enough to raise eyebrows, and isn't afraid to admit that masturbation is the second best way to spend time. Someone like me! Help me put up posters.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
