But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
i mean really, i cant compete with a cucumber
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
the evidence from last night is not good...
what evidence?
my underwear is on inside out, and there are french fries in my hair...
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
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