omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
She turned over and said "You smell like my dad, i just can't do this"
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I just puked in a chili’s bathroom... happy birthday to me
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
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