i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
