I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize
