So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
Yeah man... I ordered donuts, drank wine, and cried to a movie with Seth Rogen in it. Do you really think I have my shit together?
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Listen this is important.. if I die tonight you have to be the drug dealer at my funeral
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
