The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize