yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
Somewhere out there, someone is getting laid. And then theres me, watching Star Trek porn while my roommate plays World of Warcraft next door
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
