I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Just googled "penis wearing a hat" i think it's safe to say nobody found my ex's lost phone...
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
My tinder date wouldn't stop talking about the Star Wars movie trailer long enough to fuck me. HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
