At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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