I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
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